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Apart from its deleterious effect on my attention span, the worst aspect of the internet for me is its relentlessness in exposing me to things I’d rather not see.

For example, this. Which, you know, basically just makes me feel dirty. Because the mind immediately starts painting in the details here, you know. You start imagining the catch phrases and verbal tics being used in entirely new ways. It’s enough to make you want to unscrew your calvarium, pop the old brain out for a sec, and give it a good scrub-a-dub.

A Very Special Thank You to Joel Fleming, who is developing a unique expertise in “things that make me go erghhhhh”.

He haunts me still.

I watched only the highlights of Chretien’s testimony on the news the other day, because I knew I could not tolerate more than that. I couldn’t read the text of his remarks. I couldn’t watch the entire cross-examination.

I cannot even generate a coherent response, in the way Jerry Aldini or Let it Bleed or Babbling Brooks have ably done. I feel like a psychiatrist, who finds himself reacting emotionally to his patient’s reflections rather than intellectually.

You know how you can be on your way to work, thinking, “something’s just not right… coffee’s here, wallet’s there, pager is… damndamndamn” because you can then immediately visualize the g*dd*mn thing sitting on your countertop?

So…

Turns out the Red Ensign Standard No. 14 went and got itself all posted-like over at Nathan’s place. Er, “got itself posted” in the same way a baby “gets itself born”, through the simple expedient of getting some generous soul to do all the work.

In this case, Nathan.

Tip o’ the cap, sir.

Football Fans for Truth–the website that first brought you the hard facts about John Kerry throwing like a girl–now brings you the Christopher Hitchens Top Ten.

My favourite:

On Colin Powell:

“From William Jennings Bryan to Cyrus Vance, history used to suggest a remedy for secretaries of state who became demoralized or disillusioned with the policies pursued by their presidents: resignation. More than just quitting, resignation also at least implies an acceptance of responsibility (as it did, for example, when Lord Carrington resigned as Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher’s foreign secretary over the Falklands imbroglio). But with Powell, one has never been entirely sure whether he considers collective responsibility to be a part of his cabinet rank. Instead, he offers a grudging willingness to stay on, for a little bit at least, if invited-no, make that pressed-to do so. This attitude is normally associated either with insufferable guests, or with people who appear to believe that they are performing the thankless task of holding up the sky.”

Just think.

If this World Tribune story is true, American troops could liberate Iran in about 4 ½ minutes.

(rimshot)

This is it.

THE funniest single thing I have ever seen on the internet.

Do yourself a favour. Go there now.

Thanks–a very, very deep thanks–to Damian Penny for this pointer.

Can’t

Stop

Laughing…

Odd to think that this little girl will, if we are all fortunate, never know any other kind of government than democracy.

(from Powerline)

Political realities appear immutable, but in fact they can change with startling speed. Tyranny in the Arab world is no more a metaphysically permanent truth than slavery was, or the lack of suffrage for women, or the divine right of Kings. Canadians who are fighting against the comparatively trivial political “tyranny” of the Liberal Party must take heart: our battles are so small, and compared to this little girl our chance for victory is so great.

This is moving in a way that is hard to describe.

We take so much for granted in the free West. We have the liberty to be infuriated by such little things as Toronto Star columnists and waiting times for hip replacements. I don’t mean to say those things aren’t important, but…

It is so easy to forget how lucky we are.

I feel privileged to be witness to this.

I recently came across this post at Gin and Tonic. The author describes a conversation she had with an Air Canada agent in Toronto, the week after that wildcat strike by Air Canada baggage manglers handlers.

Me: “Is the flight on time?”

Check-in Attendant (CA): (slightly surly) “Of course it is, why wouldn’t it be?”

Me: “Well, Friday it was two hours late when I flew. And then there was Wednesday.”

CA: “What happened Wednesday?”

Me (thinking, is he kidding?): “Well, there was that whole strike thing.”

CA: “That was nothing. Hardly any flights were disrupted.”

Me: “Except ours, I guess.”

CA (shoving my boarding pass at me): “The ground crews work very hard, and deserve your support. Traveling is a privilege you know. Next!”

But blogging is free.

According to 20 Questions to a Better Personality, I am…

a SRDF–Sober Rational Destructive Follower. This makes you a Fountain of Knowledge.

You are cool, analytical, intelligent and completely unfunny. Sometimes you slice through conversation with a cutting observation that causes silence and sidelong glances. You make a strong and lasting impression on everyone you meet, the quality of which depends more on their personality than yours.

You may feel persecuted, as you can become a target for fun. Still, you are focused enough on your work and secure enough in your abilities not to worry overly.

You are productive and invaluable to those you work for. You are loyal, steadfast, and conscientious. Your grooming is impeccable. You are in good shape.